Saturday, September 17, 2011

bukan mudah~

mom last bday....1 may 2011...passed away 26 may 2011...

for now...blog ni hanye tempat utk aku luahkan prasaan bile rase x ttanggung...aku mmg bukan org yg syes b'blog...aku cume buke bile perlu...
ye...bukan mudah untuk aku lupekan segalanya....for this time....only time will cure...aku mmg pnuh smangat utk truskan perjuangan aku belajar...truskan final year ms mule2 aku khilangan dia......tp ntahla...skrg bile dah jejak kaki kt usm...aku hilang smangat...sparuh jiwe aku masih xde...sparuh smangat aku...dri aku...hilang lg...aku masih terlalu rndukan mak...trus terang...bukan mudah aku nk hadapi n ambil alih peranan seorg ibu..nk bdepan dgn kerenah keluarga...sebelah pihak ckp camni...sblh phak lg camni...skali lg aku kat tgh2...aku ok...aku boleh buat sume house chores...aku cbe nk msk sebaik arwah...tp aku x ble tahan bile ayah masih lagi mnangis time mkn...masih cakap...kalau mak ko ade lg..kalo mak ko pakai ni...kalo mak ko nampak ni...ye...aku masih ble tsenyum denga sume tu...tp dlm ht ni...mnjerit....tlgla ayah...hentikan...nun pn sedih juge...tp sume tu x terucap...takut sekeping hati yg pernah die kongsikan dengan mak dlu tu retak pula...aku cube nk bahagiakan die..tp mana kan nk sama layanan seorg anak dgn seorg isteri...sume tu masih dlm pimbangan kami...biarlah sumenye dah btol2 sdie...ht ni msih mnangis lg...untung mreka yg masih ada mak lg...ibu yg ckup sempurna bg aku....secantik bidadari...sebaik2 ibu dan isteri...insyaallah mak shahid ye mak....adik lg 2 org kn tunggu mak...tnggu nun skali mak ye...mak dpt doakan nun lg x mak...nun xde smangat...

Monday, June 13, 2011

RASE NK BERMONOLOG LAGI..
WAKTU DA KUL 530..
STILL X BLEK LAGIK
TNGGU MMBE JALAN BLEK..
TAKUT AR SKANG..
KES ASID SEGALAK
HURM..
AKU X SUKE BILE X BYK KJE..
AKU KUAT MENGELAMUN..
INGAT ORG JAUH...
TILL WHEN AKU BLE BTUL2 OK..
AKU X TAU..
NK BLEK KG PON..
KENANGAN DIE..
KT MANE2 JE..
HURM..
TP..
RINDU NK ZIARAH KBUR MAK
AKU INGATKAN NK SMBUNG KJE SINI DLM SBULAN SBLM NEK USM
BUT I RATHER CHOSE TO STAY WITH MY FATHER N SIS...
BEFORE AKU BLEK PENANG..
NANTI MESTI DA JARANG BLEK..
SBB SURI XDE..
NTAHLA..
AKU NI JNIS X SAMPAI HT
LG NK TGGALKAN AYAH SORANG2..
NTAH MCM MANE DIE URUS UMA..
RASE CAM MLS NK STUDY LG..
BUT AKU KNE INGAT
JANJI AKU..
KU NK JD ANK SOLEHAH DIE N BERJAYA...
INSYAALLAH
AKU X MEN2 NGN KATE2 AKU...

Friday, June 10, 2011

SEMOGA MAK BAHAGIA DI SANA...

ALFATIHAH BUAT IBUKU YANG TERCINTA..
HAPSAH BINTI SAHAR...
YANG TELAH PERGI MENGHADAP ILAHI..
TUHAN SAJA TAU BETAPA AKU MERINDUINYA...
I'M STILL HOPING DIE BALIK..
I REALLY MISS HER..
26 MEI 2011...
KHAMIS
12.05 P.M...
ARWAH MENGHADAP ILLAHI...

ALHAMDULILLAH..
MAK SENYUM..MAK CANTIK ..
CANTIK SGT..
MAK HIDUP CANTIK..
MAK PERGI PON CANTIK...

MEMANG...AKU MARAH DGN CINE YG LANGGA MAK AKU TU..
TP KITE ISLAM...AKU TERIMA NI SEBAGAI TAKDIR..
QADA' DAN QADAR ILLAHI...

ALHAMDULILLAH...
SEMPAT AKU BALIK SAMBUT HARI LAHIR MAK YG KE 52 01 MEI HARI TU...

SEJAK MAK PERGI..
AKU NEKAD..
AKU NK BERUBAH...
KEJALANNYA..
NAK JD ANK YG SOLEHAH BUAT DIE..
SBB DOA ANAK2 SOLEHAH AKAN SMPAI KT DIE.
AKU NK SAPA MAK HR2 DGN AFATIHAH...





Sunday, April 24, 2011

=_= mau jadi tucin

hari ni aku x tdo...
so aku jadi camni...
=_=



mak aku kate kalo aku ngantuk mate aku stim...
stim camni kot..
=_=

xpon camni...=_=


=_=
ngantuk...
mau tdo camni..



xpon camni



aku mau jadi tucin...xyah wat assignment...
=_=
zzzZZZZZZZ...

Friday, April 22, 2011

IT IS HARD TO FORGET...=_=lll


HATE THIS FEELING MUCH!
the hardness in forgetting someTHING..
urghhh...
susah..
but for him..i'll do it 4 sure...
i'm doin it HARDLY...
but the scene keep annoying n irritating..
the car...
the luxury..
the spectacle..
the intelect pic..
the smile..
the promises...
the memories...
the dream..

when i'm completely forget it all..

it appears in many ways..
it keeps annoying n annoying..
bothering and bothering..

menjentik
menyinggah
menghinggap

REALLY..ITS HARD TO FORGET WHAT WE
USUALLY REMEMBER...
ITS HARD TO FORGET WHEN IT RELATED TO OUR DREAMS...
ITS HARD TO FORGET WHEN IT HAD LIVED SCARS AND FLOWERS INSIDE...
ITS HARD TO FORGET WHEN THERE'S STILL HOPE..
ITS HARD TO FORGET WHEN IT WAS ABOUT SACRIFICING..
ITS HARD TO FORGET WHEN IT IS ONE OF UR BEST CHOICE..
ITS HARD TO FORGET WHEN IT ALMOST BE COMPLETE FOR SOMETHING WE DESIRE...



monochrome...the sweetness inside it...


heh!
tetibe mau tulis2
aku rase aku ni bese jek!
heh!
aku mmg biase!
nothin to be proud of!
biase sgt2..
membusykan dri...
pastu pening sdrik
byk sgt bnde yg aku xde
mbataskan tuk aku wat yg lbey bek dr skrg
n xbley buat ape yg aku nak..
urgh...nyampah tol bile x dpt..
bile x ade...
=_=lll
ye..hdup aku monochrome..
tau x?
monokrom tu 1 warne je..
warne ape nk pilih?
klabu..itamputeh taik cicak
sbb?
ade suramnye
ade tenangnye
ade cool nye..
ade nostalgic nye..
bhse omputeh yg sesuai..

the loneliness..
the silent..
the whisper..
the calm..

bile sunyi...mmg kite murung kn...sunyi tu teman...
so aku x sdey bile aku sunyi..
sbb kesunyian tu sdg menemani..
dlm ht ade taman?
what the fish?
dlm ht aku kaler klabu jek..
biola...
kelabu itu
tenang..
mcm angin yg sepoi2 bahase...
tatkale kite duk sorg atas titi mhadap senja dlm mud monokrom...
hohohohooo...

aku nk duduk kt situh sensorg...nk3!

korg pening ke bace?
sukati aku la ayat aku...
org seni je paham..
huuu..
=_=

hurm...aku suke flash back the past
sbb ms tu dunia pnuh warne
cam gule2 bulat berwarne warni
owh...gule2...
manisnye ekaw...

bg aku...
monokrom itu indah
black n white itu comey
nostalgic...bringing back memories n moods..
ye..aku ckup suke flash back...
kdg2...aku plek ngan mindset aku...
knp msti aku toleh blek ke blakang???
for me...monochrome is sweet..
the sweetnesses of memories...
kmanisan tu dah ckup..
xperlu ade warna yg mana pixel n resolusinye tinggi...
xperlu ade warne yg di increase kn bright n contrast..
x perlu reduce noise..
sbb makin rosak gambar tu mkn manis makin bernilai memory tu...
xperlu ade photoshop or spot healing
ckup sekadar senyuman...
even x senyum dlm gambar tu pn..memory tu ttp ade...
ttp manis dlm ingatan..
cam
memory keputat...oh ketupat...

ketupat yg manis..memory yg manis..hari yg manis....rendang yg manis...kueh tat yg manis...mak yg manis...ayah yg manis...adik beradik...yg ma..nis...isk3....

mak ayah..orang rndu sbnanye ni..
T.T

manisnya mak mase ni...


mis u mom...
terima kasih sbb melahirkan saya...
terima kasih atas segala pengorbanan mak..
mak tetap manis..
ur always b my colorful n sweet monochrome..

p/s:themonochromedeeyaismissingthepastandhercolorfulandsweetmonochrome...



y should them thrown away...


salam...lame x update...
deeya bru je habis study tok paper marketing sok..
harap2 ley wat..
(^^)
hurm..deeya sgt2 tsentuh n tkilan..
juz now while deeya finding ideas for FYP..
deeya taip tajuk ni..
ISU PENGGUGURAN BAYI...
then it leads me to this blog...
hati deya tsentuh..
this title quite interesting for deya..
doing awareness campaign might be something yg belum org wat lg kn regarding kes ni....
slame ni...deeya xtau...yg janin2 yg digugurkan tu..banyak yg x dituntut semula..
sdey kan..
btape kjamnye manusia..
korang tgkla sdri k...


seriously..i'm touched...

then deeya research tntg idea tntg BEGGARS...
mcm2 info dpt..
juz need to do mind mapping la..
isu ni pn deeya nk bncg ngan lect nanti...
sbb deeya rase reseach sng dpt..kt penang ni...sekitar chow rasta byk sgt pengemis...kt jajantas...kt tmpat jual jeruk..pasar mlm pn ramai sgt2..
hurm...

ok..deeya nk sambung cari idea lg...
before cuti nk kne submit kt lect idea2 ni...
tata..
(^^)
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...